I do it a lot, more often when I’m depressed. Which doesn’t make sense since, its the time I need them the most. But in a way, it is when you truly know who the real ones are; those who force their selves in your life despite being pushed away. HAHAHA My relationships with my friends are always threatened by my insensitivity or over-sensitivity. I guess that’s the problem with me, I’m never neutral, just hot or cold, never in between. That’s why I’m pretty hard to deal with (but I guess admitting these to myself makes things some how easier) and I know I should try harder in showing my appreciation to the people around me, I know I don’t have much in life, but I try to be grateful for everything that I have, even though I’m bad at showing it.
First step, even though its baby steps, try to be happy on my own; drive away the sadness and misery.
Well, seeing my life 2 years ago, I was seriously messed up. Everything was wrong and out of hand. But look at me now. Look how far I’ve come with-out anyone holding my hand. Honestly.. this is part right here, right now.. this is the peak of my teenage life and I’m happy as fuck.
I just felt like documenting this moment. The moment when I realized that I lead a beautiful life. The moment when I realized that everything’s wonderful. And more wonderful things to come. God TRULY had a plan for me.
There was a reason why I suffered so much before. There was a reason why I was unhappy for a couple of months. There was a reason why I had to get hurt. It is so that I’ll appreciate what I have now. It’s so I’ll appreciate the little things.